Climate Avengers?

(August 8, 2019)

It scans like the plot from a bad Marvel movie, perhaps called Climate Avengers.

The Arctic burns; glaciers disappear and migrants drown. Cities set scorching new heat records, crops are failing, millions will starve if cholera and Ebola do not kill them first.

Swedish teen climate hero Greta Thunberg refuses to fly across the ocean, and so cadges a lift on a sailboat to September’s One Last Chance to Save the Planet UN summit meeting in New York City. Other climate heroes are killed, one almost every other day in 2018, for the crimes of defending their homes, their water and their land against corporate greed and political corruption in order to keep hope alive for a sustainable future for their children.

The stage is set for the Climate Avengers to arrive. It’s election season on both sides of the border, so the cast assembles in a kind of pick-your-own-Avenger situation… and it’s a disappointment for everyone in the audience.

In the midst of our climate crisis, the planetary emergency that requires brilliant, incisive leadership to save the planet and all of us from, well, ourselves, we get this motley crew instead:

From his villa in Costa Rica, Brian (PST) Pallister pledges to remove provincial sales tax on dead people and pedicures, while Justin (Is that a pipeline in your pocket?) Trudeau promises to turn the clock back to 2015 to recover his promises for electoral reform, gender equality and respect for Indigenous Peoples.

Jumpin’ Jagmeet Singh is fuming in his box, hoping that his handlers will eventually turn the crank enough to pop the lid and let him out to campaign — but is upset that someone stole his bicycle, so he will have to walk if he ever decides to return to Ontario.

Andrew (Alfred E. Neuman) Scheer is mad that his MAD magazine has been cancelled, but is secretly relieved that Conservative policies will no longer be leaked in its pages, so they can dribble out again — to the despair of comedy writers for The Beaverton, who find it hard to write more amusing copy than his press conferences provide.

Wab (Will you be my candidate?) Kinew is discovering that truth in politics is almost as rare as forgiveness and a fresh start, especially when you are the only one playing that kind of game. Speaking of discoveries, Dougald (Upsweep my hair) Lamont has found out that being the third party in Manitoba politics is like being the third wheel on Jagmeet’s bicycle… not really needed, and awkward around obstacles.

And then there are the Greens, who by colour are either sustainable or nauseating, and can’t make their own minds up either way — which is what happens when you have a leader named May, rather than Must — even though she clearly pedals her own bicycle and won’t let anyone put her in a box… not for long, anyway — just until the judge grants bail.

As for “Mad Max” Bernier, well, his vision of the future is as chaotic and nihilistic as anything Mel Gibson could produce in his worst nightmare.

In comparison to what we need at this point in time, this group makes the Guardians of the Galaxy look like polished professionals. Perhaps buried in the northern Manitoba bush there is our own aboriginal Wakanda, hiding the skills, wisdom and intelligence of a Black Panther that we need to lead our province and our country in a world facing its ultimate crisis, but we are almost out of time.

Looking south, we can count on little help from our neighbours, who only wish their politicians had the youth, wisdom and vitality of our own — Jon Gerrard, for example, would have to sit at the kids’ table at either the Republican or Democratic convention.

Given this situation, it’s no wonder the young people would rather stay home than vote. Yet this is precisely the problem; because the young people didn’t vote, the world got Brexit, Boris Johnson, Donald Trump and — closer to home — Jason Kenney and Doug Ford.

I’ve often been prodded, after saying things like this, to run for office myself. But — after spending most of my days among 18- to 22-year-old students — at 60, I know I am too old for politics.

I have much less to lose than young people, too much reason to hang onto the way things are (or the way I want to remember them) instead of doing what needs to be done to transform our society and our communities so they will survive in the desperate days that lie ahead.

Elders can supply wisdom (when they have it!), but our hope lies with the young people and their non-violent, active and forceful engagement to change the systems that threaten their future.

If extinction is our current destination, then their only option — and ours — is rebellion.

Extinction Rebellion — XR — coming soon. Watch for it.

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